Monday, June 12, 2006

What Has Life to Offer...

If the world won’t adjust to you, then you have to adjust to the world.

Such a tricky phrase I picked up from the hit series Crime Scene Investigation (CSI). It was actually an episode about midgets trying to survive in a world of normal people whom they call giants. Truly, it is indeed hard to wait for the world to adjust to you, if not impossible in most cases. Evidently, people need to really do their share to be able to fit in, something that is relevant and important for people to be able to exist normally.

Each of us led different lives. Some may enjoy their life, while some are still in search of that icing on the cake in their lives where they can call themselves accomplished people, successful as far as their goal towards and ideal future is concerned. However, if it were to be summed up, I would say that not even ¼ of the world population of today can be considered content with what they have, what they have accomplished and what they pictured themselves some years back. The search for total content in their lives is still out there, but the truth of the matter is, the more a person is exposed, the more he or she must satisfy their needs and wants.

I am no hypocrite. I know I still have two things lacking in my life. One is to live on my own, living with my daughter in a place where I can say I built and sweated out. The road is not an easy one. Not really to blame the ongoing crisis, peso devaluation and governing problems that the world is facing, responsibility still needs to be honed on my part. Success doesn’t come easy and I am aware of this. All people need to work double time to consider themselves successful and gifted.

The other is perhaps easier for some but harder for me. The partner of my dreams. I have not given up hope really. It’s just that whenever I look back, an ordinary man would have committed suicide or gone out of his mind already. It is really hard when you thought that everything has already been settled, thinking and believing faithfully despite the hard times. Maybe being to confident and trusting is not at all very comforting. People feel they can change their fate and destiny, while I, God fearing as I am, approached in a different way, the normal way.

Hence, my search for a perfect fit to the puzzle is still out there somewhere. I know I have a few years left in my existence here, something that all of us are destined to have. At the moment, there are possible people I wanted to be that person, but unfortunately, maintaining the attitude of accepting and moving on has become my shield. Perhaps I have lost confidence and myself and settled to being single. Pains inside I know, but I believe it is better than finding someone and pretending to be happy. I don’t consider it a part of life as being unfair, sometimes we just have to move on and wait for what else life has to offer us.

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